Star Trek Into Darkness (2013)

4 1/2 Vulcan Salutes out of 5

Confession: I am a Trekkie. Not a “Trekker,” or whatever the hip fans call themselves these days. I’m an old school Trekkie, and it is as a Trekkie that I say that Star Trek into Darkness is Good Trek. It hits all the right notes, and the cast proves that their ability to take on the iconic roles of the Enterprise crew was not a fluke in 2009. Moreover, Star Trek Into Darkness manages to walk the line between escapist entertainment and social commentary much like the original TV series did, but that other Trek movies rarely accomplish.

Prometheus (2012) 4 1/2 Xenomorph Eggs (out of 5)

There has been much speculation since Prometheus was announced regarding what exactly it would be, and how (if at all) it would connect to the Alien franchise. Make no mistake: this IS a prequel, and it answers some of the questions left blissfully unanswered by the original Alien film. Ultimately, this is both the film’s blessing and its curse. That said, it is a solid, well-made science fiction film that blends contemporary effects with a more old-fashioned, deliberate pace and tone. In addition, the 3D is worth the money, serving typically to add depth to shots – and most importantly it is NOT a post-conversion.

The Avengers (2012)

4 Cosmic Cubes (out of 5)

Iron Man. Thor. Captain America. The Incredible Hulk. The Redhead Spy from Iron Man 2 and That Arrow-Shooty Guy Who Didn’t Do Much in Thor (Okay, yeah, Black Widow and Hawkeye. I know who they are. I’m a comic book reader. I’ll get to my point in a minute). Marvel has been building their cinematic universe for about four years now, and it has all been building to this film. How does that kind of buildup pay off? Pretty damn well for fans of the series and/or the comics.

JOHN CARTER (2012)

4 1/2 White Apes (out of 5)

John Carter has been a long time coming. I can’t think of many other projects that have been in development, almost nonstop, for as long as Edgar Rice Burroughs’ planetary romance. The first novel, A Princess of Mars was first serialized in 1912 before its full publication in 1917, and a big-budget film adaptation has been in various stages of development since the 1930s. A surprising list of filmmakers, including Bob Clampett, Ray Harryhausen, John McTiernan, Robert Rodriguez, and Jon Favreau, were all attached to the adaptation as it passed from studio to studio over the decades until it finally made it to the screen thanks to Disney and Andrew Stanton.*

Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy

&

Mission: Impossible
Ghost Protocol

4 Silenced Walther PPKs (out of 5)

This past weekend I saw both Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy and Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol. Rarely have I seen two films technically of the same genre, yet almost entirely different in tone, style, and plot. However, both films do what they do very well, and present interestingly contrasting interpretations of the spy genre.

Captain America: The First Avenger (2011)

Trey’s rating: 5 mighty shields (out of 5)

So often when a superhero movie comes out, both studio & press rush to compare it to prior successes. Thus, we were sold Green Lantern as being kinda like Iron Man, but with outer space & aliens, and references are already being made to how The Amazing Spider-Man will take the Spider-Man franchise more into the realm of The Dark Knight. A valid comparison (that nobody but me seemed to be making, probably because I’m the only one who doesn’t think it an insult) was that Marvel’s earlier film this summer, Thor, owes more than a little to 80s sci-fi/fantasy superhero movie Masters of the Universe. However, it is with great pleasure that I say Captain America: the First Avenger is unique on the increasingly crowded list of superhero films.

Super 8 (2011)

Trey’s rating: 4 Spielbergs (out of 5)

It has been said that with North by Northwest Alfred Hitchcock made the quintessential Hitchcock film by intentionally filling it with as many “Hitchcock moments” – tropes, gags, and sequences that had become associated with the director throughout his career – as he could.  Love it or hate it, J. J. Abrams appears to have set out to make the quintessential Steven Spielberg movie.

X-Men First Class (2011)

Trey’s rating: 3 Furry Blue Geniuses Piloting Supersonic Jets (out of 5)

I’ll be honest – I’m not the biggest fan of the X-Men, in print or on the screen.  In general the franchise tends to suffer from an unbalanced ratio of character quantity to level of character depth, as well as some very complicated continuity, which makes even the most basic exposition difficult.  Add to that the fact that the last two X-movies were decidedly sub-par (read: GARBAGE), and you’ll understand that it was with some hesitation that I went into the theater to watch X-Men First Class.

Thor (2011)

Trey’s Rating:  4 Agent Coulsons (out of 5)

The start of summer (which has actually crept pretty far into late spring this year) means blockbuster season has begun. Once again Marvel is kicking off the season with their first of two (three if you count X-Men: First Class – which I don’t) superhero movies: The Mighty Thor. As with Marvel’s other recent films, Thor serves as an introduction to the title character, along with his powers, backstory, supporting characters, and (most importantly to Marvel) his connection to the rest of the Marvel movieverse.

UPDATE: In case you haven’t figured it out already, this entire post is an April Fools joke, and I will likely never review ANY of these films on my blog (maybe on Bad Movie Nite, though).

I think this speaks for itself.  These are the films which, I believe, have made the greatest contribution to cinema both as an entertainment medium and an art form.  I won’t be going into too much detail – I’ll save that for the individual reviews.  Instead, think of this as a preview of things to come on the blog.